HEALING: WHY TOUCH IS SO IMPORTANT
LETTING GO OF LONELINESS
When you think about the word lonely, what comes up for you? What do you visualize? Are you lonely right now?
Often on a health, healing, spiritual journey we can feel feel lonely. Not the physical act of being alone, as that's totally different from loneliness. Loneliness is often shrouded in deeper feelings, emotions, thoughts and stir up fear based emotions within us that can sink us even deeper into said loneliness.
When we experience symptoms, don't feel like ourselves, have just been diagnosed with something, when doctors / family / friends don't believe you, when you're so scared of what's happening you don't even want to speak about it, physical manifestations of illness (lack of self-confidence + not feeling like You) can fully take over, and everything that comes with feeling foreign in your own body can be very isolating, and down right lonely, as the deeper rooted emotions here are that no one understands, I don't want to burden anyone, and fear itself can shun the people we so love, as fear is truly the opposite of love.
We think, whether it's our own perceptions, or the actual reality, that no one truly understands what you're going through, even if it's not true, you perceive that it is, as you've already created a story around the situation at hand.
This is often why so many people seek out forums, Dr. Google (which can be a V scary & slippery slope), and support groups with people going through similar symptoms, as they "get it ". We usually find deep solace in other people's journey's, symptoms, experiences, whether it helps us feel less alone, or it allows us to justify our emotions, and behaviours.
But when we aren't feeling our best, experiencing physical / mental symptoms and illnesses, we shy away, retreat, shell up, hide, run away, and become a "loner, because we don't want to burden people, we think they won't / don't understand, or you're too scared to seek or ask for support, whether through family, friend, or a natural practitioner / coach who can take it deeper. When we don't feel like ourselves, it's our natural tendency to retreat. This is why so many people who have been diagnosed with a illness, or experience chronic pain also develop depression, or a myriad of other mental / emotional states. It's a very common link, not only on a physiological level, but on a biological level.
Ultimately your biography (what you tell yourself, your actions, thoughts, emotions, etc...) creates your biology. So it's very easy to get caught up in this cyclical state.
This really is an evolutionary coping mechanism. Back in the day, the weak were shunned, they were put away until they got better for fear of spreading the disease, or heaven forbid they took the unwell persons life for fear of spreading said illnesses, as they couldn't or didn't know how to contain it. Also think of modern day times, "unwell" humans are put into hospitals with no family, friends, familiar comforts, poor nutrient-void food, and are in some form "shunned" from the rest of the "well" world. It's been ingrained into us.
You're sick at work, don't come in, you will spread your germs! Stay away, stay away, stay away, hide, be alone, and when you're better you're welcome back.
For sure in some situations, there are air borne viruses that are being taken into consideration, but I'm talking about the general theme of casting away unwell individuals that's been steeped into our society / cellular nature, labeling them, not understanding what they are going through, distancing, and seeing them in a different light.
The crazy thing about all of this, is when we are our lowest, most unwell, have been diagnosed with an illness, feeling sick, start to elicit physical manifestations in relation to what's going on inside (acne, hair loss, weight gain, using a cane, a wheelchair), we actually need connection, human interaction, physical touch, emotional sentiment the most, as it's very, very, very healing to the core of our being.
I can recall sooooooo many times when I felt alone with my lyme disease - too much, and too painful to go into full detail here. But it's the loneliest I've ever felt in my life. I felt as if I knew something was really wrong but didn' t know what, that my body was in a lot of pain but couldn't express it - I was so good at hiding it, no one really knew how bad it was, family and friends still don't really know. So I kept it all to myself, I was the "grandma", I spent so many days, months, years alone, as I couldn't put into words how I felt, and I didn't want to burden others (reflecting + doing the work now, that is a lot of shadow). My symptoms were so wild, and I had to exert a lot of energy just being normal so it was a lot to be around people. I resisted community, and physical touch for so long. And while that was my reality back then, I've learned a lot since then as my healing evolution has taken place. I actually healed at such a faster rate when I started to open up to touch, allowed someone / people into my space, and welcomed all that energy that came with it, as I had shunned it for over five years.
So why is touch / coming out of isolation so powerful in YOUR healing JOURNEY ?
The healing power of touch is critical for life. Think of newborn babies and their actual need for touch, it isn't really an option. If babies don't get physical touch they don't grow and develop normally. We need touch, we need physical presence, and we need support. Failure to thrive stems from the lack of touch + nurturing at a very young age. The more we turn away, hole up, the more we sink deeper into isolation, and we're already a touch deprived society, so it's only heightened when we consciously make the decision to step into a state of loneliness.
JUST A FEW HEALTH BENEFITS OF TOUCH TO GET YOU TO SINK DEEPER
- eases pain
- helps with infant growth
- enhances vital signs
- stabilizes body temp
- can communicate positivity
- helps provide better sleep
- reduces irritability
- increases sociability
- strengthens relationships
- strengthens immune system
- helps with depression
- increases proper digestion
- releases serotonin
- enhances a sense of well-being
- stimulates oxytocin – the cuddle hormone
- slows heart rate – lowers blood pressure
- lowers the stress hormone cortisol
- gives comfort and relieves sadness
- can help us feel happiness & joy
- releases tension & tightness
- helps migraine pain
It's so powerful.
It's why I became a Reiki practitioner as well, as coupling my nutrition / mind / body work with the healing power of touch is magical.
You can't escape it, you can only isolate for so long, and even when you feel like you're lonely, you're NEVER truly alone, for you always have yourself. This is where healing starts, and ends, find comfort in that, and embrace the journey. It will allow you to sink deeper, heal fully, and start you on the path to your best life.
To delve deeper ask yourself these questions
1. What are you missing to take your healing to the next step?
2. Do you feel alone?
3. Does your family + friends have a hard time understanding something what's going on within you?
4.How do you feel about physical touch?
5. Are you not being completely honest with how you're feeling?
6. Is your Mind + Nervous system on hyper drive?
Sit in these answers, meditate on them, and then ask yourself what do you need from yourself, and others?
IF YOU'RE LOOKING TO HEAL ON A DEEPER LEVEL. I WORK PRIVATELY 1-1 IN MY PRACTICE, VIA IN PERSON SESSIONS (TORONTO) + VIA SKYPE. LET'S CONNECT - I WOULD BE HONOURED TO WORK WITH YOU ON ANY LEVEL YOU SO DESIRE + RESONATE WITH.