WHY LACK OF PATIENCE MIGHT BE BLOCKING YOU FROM HEALING

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PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE 

I believe we’re programmed / imprinted for patience, but life has taught us how not to be. Everything we see on TV, movies, SM, seem to just appear. When we’re all left asking “how, how, how did they / are they doing that ”…. when in true essence patience is behind it all, we just can’t register this in our brains, as the software that’s instilled in our hardware keeps on telling us otherwise. We’ve all been led to believe that there is a quick fix + silver bullet. It’s as if the neural pathways have been severed. We don’t want to believe that what we so desire / want / feel our soul calling to is on the other side of patience. I see this often when it comes to skin + my clients, as we all just want to be healed / feel better now, and forget that a transformational journey takes times. I fullllllly understand the energy in wanting to just be better now, as I’ve been there too many times, but what we’re trying to skip is actually the most magical, juiciest, most transformational + healing lessons. It’s where I’ve been able to tap into parts of my psyche - gifts that I didn’t even know existed.

I consider it to be a super power, and even did a solo podcast episode on it a few months ago, as it’s been such a powerful tool on my own journey.

When we're trying to heal and do a million things at once, we're usually practicing impatience & blocking our healing, which is also a natural state as we all want to be / have the thing we’re working towards. When we’re in a state of impatience we’re usually anxious, operating out of fear, desperation, worry, and we’re not sinking into a flow state, which is where I believe healing to be. When we trust, flow, surrender, & practice patience while navigating our journey, work, and growth only beautiful things can be birthed from this.

It's not your fault, we've been raised and taught that instant gratification is the way to life. From the birth of fast food (it's still a new phenomenon), inputing information - Hi Dr. Google - and getting an instant reply / diagnosis / log of forums, information, websites & links, to the beauty industry that continually filters in messages that guarantee visible results in just a few short weeks, even days. Not saying we can’t see, feel and harness results right away, we can, it’s just not an expectation we should have.

This stuff has been ingrained in us since birth! Let's roll it back even further, to a very biological / physical necessity, but instant gratification non-the-less, which happens with most food and beverage products. We're hungry, our mother gives us her breast, we feed, and voila! We're happy. We don't wait for it, if we do we scream + cry like crazy, and hence it's ours when we want it and the volume of how much we want. 

I always like to stress that it's not your fault that we behave in these conditioned patterns, and habits. It's what we know, it's been reinforced thousands of times, and we gain pleasure from viewing or experience said desired outcome of so called gratification. 

Conversely, patience doesn't provide such instant results, hits of dopamine / oxytocin (feel good hormones), pleasure or gratification. Patience is hard, it takes work, and to really see results time has to pass, sometimes weeks, months and in my case a decade plus some. We can practice patience, but it's usually not natural, as it takes work and we’re not super conditioned. We're humans who were built to resist change, stay in wells of comfort, and are naturally / historically built for pessimistic reactions and states of mind, because it helps us do one thing, survive. So I hear you, patience is hard, it's not always fun, it takes work, but what is on the other side is pure beauty, transformation, and your Self.

Yet if we want sustainable, life-long, and enriching results Patience needs to be practiced, nourished, and integrated into Life, not just your healing journey, whether it's healing your skin, depression, connecting with your life partner, finding your perfect apartment / house, waiting to get a pet…

Patience is one of your keys to healing, not just your skin, but anything. 

I can honestly say that patience is something I've practiced, welcomed and have actually found quite rewarding, and insanely beautiful. It's something I've learned (via practice) through healing my body naturally, and holistically,  finding (manifesting) my now husband, and building my practice + business, which started in 2013, but really in 2008 when I started fashion blogging! I’ve been in blogging for 11 years now. I was a OG fashion blogger (leeselooks), which is crazy to reflect on.

Was it or is it easy for me?  Not really. Maybe it comes a little more naturally to me as I'm more introverted / inwards, but it still wasn't easy, and of course I still have moments / periods of procrastination or just wanting to be through something quickly. But if I’ve learned anything, its the in-between that produces the most magical transformations.

I had very low points that lasted for years, never doubting the fact that I would heal, and succeed in brining my purpose to life, but I still had to trudge through the waters of patience, I knew if I was to heal, it was vital to my success. Nothing fell into my lap, my skin took years to heal, lyme disease over a decade +++, finding my husband took over five years of being consciously single. I knew I had so much internal work to do, working steadily to build my practice since 2013, working part-time jobs, full-time jobs, seeing clients in the evenings, on weekends, and blogging whenever I had time, and space. If people could only be the fly on the wall for so many people they love, follow, admire, aspire, are inspired by…

I had to work to practice patience, to sit in the dark moments, to go through it (the only way) and not around it (won't be sustainable). 

When I was healing with and from lyme disease I really didn't have a choice, it's what the Universe was calling me to do, it was part of my journey, and I believe it's why I'm able to do what I do today.

I know  people see my skin, and think that I'm lucky,  or that I just have nice skin, which is not the case. It's been a long, long, long road to get to where I am today. I struggled with acne in my teens, and when I was living in NYC, at the height of a “mysterious illness”, my skin was at its worst.

I was not only losing my hair in clumps, but my skin was breaking out in cystic bumps, pustules, terrible pigmentation, and just breakouts galore. Every morning I would wake up with a new breakout, I picked, and even when I didn’t pick or pop I was left with red pigmentation that was photosensitive and lasted for months. The summer of 16' hit and I was still experiencing hormonal breakouts, hormonal imbalance, and still patiently working at repairing my body, nourishing it, and learning it from the inside out. To say it's been a journey would be an understatement. There were so many moments that I hoped and prayed that a miracle product / treatment existed that would clear my acne, or that my skin would just clear up in a few months, if that would of happened though I never would of healed sustainable, and ultimately learned the art of patience.

I only ever share my story, and be as open and honest with you as I can, because I never want you to think that you can’t do it too - Whatever you’re experiencing.

It's something that I speak with all my clients about. Without patience, it's a short-term + short-lived gain, at the expense of a life-long and sustainable win. Patience only breeds greatness. No great invention was met with instant success, just like no healing journey was met without patience, time, and the wonder of going through it, and not around it. I think of this quote often, for without Edison's patience he wouldn't have discovered the light bulb.  

“I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.” 
― Thomas A. Edison

We all love to relish in the beauty of butterflies, they are majestical, fly with ease, and elicit a sense of lightness and grace. Yet we often forget, or block out the vision that this butterfly was once a caterpillar that was squiggling across your pavement. Who then proceeded into a cocoon stage ( your healing + rewiring + patience), to then flourish, develop and nurture itself to transform into the butterfly that it always was. The caterpillar and butterfly are one of the same, the only difference is what our visual eye sees and believes, and all the hard work we don't see pre-conception of that caterpillar to its days fluttering around as a beautiful butterfly.

The caterpillar is the butterfly, and the butterfly is the caterpillar. Just as you will always be You, with or without a symptom (i.e) acne, your internal doesn't shift, but the journey, healing, and patience is where the magic lies. It's what will take you from the caterpillar, into your cocoon (healing), into your most authentic + radiant being, from the inside out (butterfly). For without patience, there is no beauty in the journey. This is where the growth, evolution, and You stories are birthed... Relish in patience, and be patient with the work / investments you have to make, to get the results you so desire. 

 

JOURNAL //

1. Do you consider yourself a patience person? 

2. Are you forgiving and patient of others - not yourself? 

3. Where does your impatience stem from? 

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